Wednesday, October 28, 2009


So Riaan wanted nothing to do with carving the pumpkin we bought.But hey daddy had fun carving it and Riaan warmed up to the idea once he saw he could use a knife !

But Riaan did enjoy painting his own pumpkin.Cant you see the enjoyment in his face.

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Yum Prunes

Miss Lyla has decided she is ready!

She has 2 teeth, she army crawls all over the house and recently fell in love with snickers.

She thought it was time to eat some prunes.I am sure your just dying to know how it went . Well take a look and see for yourself.

Monday, October 26, 2009

You Think What?

Yep thats what I was thinking when I read this.

" extremely obese, developmentally delayed 2 year old male"

What the Fuck? Really?

Yep thats what the genetics testing paperwork work said.

I couldnt help myself. I looked at my husband and said..

"Great they think we have a fat retarded kid ?"

I know I know that is mean and terrible for me to say but wow lets kick a mom when she down. I did not need to read that .

Sunday, October 25, 2009

It is amazing...

It is amazing how the little things seem so exciting . Last night it was Riaan saying "more" very clearly after my husband asked him to say " more". Today it was his little sister waking up and him waving and sayinh "HI". With my shock I go Riaan can you say "HI" and he said it ! Maybe I am wrong maybe things are helping, maybe he is learning from the therapy.

Thursday we go into the SSI office to talk about our options. We go in right before our flight for VA. I hope it goes well and they are willing to help pay for more therapy and Riaan's developmental preschool.

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Therapy, Evalutation Revisted

Today we had speech therapy as well as we re-evaluated our goals . Thankfully in the 3 months Riaan has started speech his speech has gone from 11 months to 19 months. He is 30 months old.

We discussed we should start working towards preparing him and I for preschool. Work on sharing items. Sitting to read a book at circle time . Practicing standing and waiting . As you remember this is so scary for me . Riaan will be leaving me for 4 days a week for 2.5 hours. For some that may not seem like a lot but he is never away from me . I am scared how he will react. I am scared that they wont be able to nurture his emotions the way I feel like he needs.

Is it possible that I am more scared then he will be ? Probley.

We also discussed SSI! So unknown to me because my child is considered developmentally delayed he can receive SSI every month to help us provide for him . At first the idea of extra money to pay for things seemed so great. It seemed like a great way to provide GF foods, clothing and activities for him. But then it suck in .

What does it really mean ? It is scary to admit something is wrong, if he was just delayed would we qualify ? If he was just delayed he would catch up...What if he isn't just delayed?

Again I am put in the mind set that I am concerned he wont be able to live a normal life..What if he has to be on SSI the rest of his life because he isn't able to live a productive life and hold a job ?

To me accepting this money is like accepting that something is wrong with him .

Then we sit and we play with play-doh, we read stories and we watch tv. He seems like just a normal kid .

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Scary Story

So the other day started like no other day Riaan gets up and turns the tv on as I get myself and Lyla up. Meaning I pee, I brush my teeth and brush my hair. Well the other morning was different . Riaan unlocked the door and walked down our stairs, through the parking lot and heads toward the road. By the time I go out to the living room I see the door wide open, I practically throw Lyla on the floor running in my pj's down the stairs to find Riaan with a man by the road. The man proceeds to tell me to calm down and that he stopped him from going by the road.

On a side note, we live on a very busy road. A road that he could have died on .

After bringing him upstairs I was so scared and shaken I had to call my husband to come home and help with the kids because I couldn't stop crying . I couldn't stop thinking what could have happened. People keep telling me these stories of there kids getting out but it doesn't help to be honest.

The scariest thing of it all, he had no idea!

I tried explaining it and have bought baby proof locks for the door and a chain but nothing can explain how I felt in that moment.

Snicker's for you Snicker's for me

Yep thats right before veggies, before fruit, before any other solid foods...Lyla gets snickers! I was shocked to walk into our kitchen and find Lyla covered in chocolate . Her sweet brother felt she needed to try some yummy chocolate.

Monday, October 19, 2009

Not Me Monday

Well I must say I have been busy doing nothing! This week I didn't...

* take Lyla's diaper off and she didn't poo on the floor and even after scrubbing the carpet her Breast milk poo didn't stain the floor

* Riaan didn't soak through his diaper and we all woke up covered in pee

* I didn't lean over Lyla's britax carseat and my sister didn't say " you know your just stretching your boobs out more !"

* I would never leave the house in the rain in flip flops, not wearing a bra and forgetting to brush my hair

Oh and I cant forget to share this story that is just shameful and I would conduct myself in better manner then this.

We weren't playing at the mall when a little boy lets say 5 comes up shoves Riaan from behind and Riaan falls slams his face on the toy structure and gets a bloody nose. I would never proceed to scream at the mother of this above mentioned child and tell her she needs to watch her kid . She didn't then proceed to sip her Starbucks coffee and tell me kids " do things like this ". I wouldn't then call her a bad name that starts with a "B" threaten to shove that coffee down her throat and then have security tell me calm down before they have to remove me from the mall .

Nope I would behave much better then that .

The mother then wouldn't say her kid didn't mean to and that I was over reacting. While all along Riaan was sitting in the stroller with a bloody nose and Lyla was nursing in my baby carrier.

Blog Party Woot Woot

I wasn't able to join in Lynnette's Last blog party so I am happy to have the time to sit down tonight and join in . Hope you take sometime and hop on over to Lynnette's blog and join in . She has such a great story and heart to share .

2. What is one thing you wouldn't want to live without?

My family. My husband is my rock even when he thinks he is letting me down. My kids are the most important thing ever.Everyday I strive to be a better person because of them .

8. Do you sleep in your make up or remove it like a good girl every night?

Um make up ? I don't remember the last time I had time to put any on.

12. What is something you love to smell?

I love the smell of pumpkin spice candles, I buy tons in the fall to last the entire year.

18. Are you a big spender or frugal?

It depends on what, I love expensive 400.00 purses but wear 2.50 old navy flip flops year round. Most of the kids clothes come from sales racks from Gymboree or Oshkosh.

Riaan Update

I have been struggling finding the time to blog, I am not sure if it because I don't have the time or if it is because there is nothing to share. Sadly we aren't having progress.

At 2.5 Years old Riaan doesn't say anything but basic sounds " dada","Ssss","Boi","dis"," all done" ( not very clear)," that" . I am getting more worried. Today at dinner I almost broke down to Stephan and said what if he cant live a normal life ? What if something is really wrong?

I have an appointment for the genetics testing so I guess we now just have to wait. I keep reminding myself he is still little, he still is a baby but it is so hard to remember that when all the children around are speaking .

Today we had a good day, we had no tantrums, we played with play-doh, we watched a movie and ate an otter pop, we had a good pleasant meal out. Then he cried when we got out of the car, he was uncontrollable getting into the house and up the stairs and into the bath. After some yelling, crying he was fine . Before I would have said he was overly tired and we didn't get home tell after 8:00pm but now I think oh that was an autistic behavior or whats wrong with him that he is acting this way ?

I had a women say to me that oh my toddler didn't talk tell 3 and he is fine. Don't worry. But my gut says worry . So tonight that's what I do I worry .

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Weather here nor there

The weather here in Washington is a cold 40 degree's with wind that could blow you away and rain that will soak you. Maybe traveling to a far away long for Halloween wont be so bad. That 60 degree weather sounds perfect to me .

Speaking of Halloween what are you ya'll doing ?

This is what my sweet little girl will be wearing but I havent found the perfect top or head band yet.

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Wordless Wednesday

Isnt this outfit so cute, my very talented mother in law made it .

Lentil Sasauge Soup

Since going Gluten Free we are eating the same thing over and over again . So I decided we needed to try new things so this week we tried Lentil soup. I will be honest I had little to no faith in myself being able to cook " new " things but I was so happy with this recipe besides the fact it kind of looked like dog food!

1 pound lentils

1.5 pounds pork or beef sasauge

2 onions

2 carrots

2 celery sticks

8 cups chicken broth

salt,pepper and garlic to taste

Brown sausage with onions, add all other ingredients and sit for 4 hours.

Could that have been any easier...nope not for me . I did attempt some GFCF bisquits that actually tasted like dog food so I wont give you that recipe .

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

FaceBook 101

So I am sure everyone has heard of facebook right ? Well I had an interesting debate on my facebook the last few weeks and I felt the need to share .

I posted this link talking about how mild fevers are good for the body, I was not implying if your child is having a seizure or anything else you should just allow it. These are what some people commented.

Jennifer I am constantly trying to explain this!

Judy Yeah!!

Josie yeah...except have you even held your baby while they have a febrile seizure ?? NOT FUN>

Summer Or when your son is approaching brain-frying temperatures.

Roxanne I think that there is resonable temperatures versus not odviously like all other things when it comes to our children it is important to trust our instinct. A small fever at 101 or 102 is diffrent then those mentioned above.

Josie temps spike in a matter of minutes. After having my baby sieze turn blue and stop breathing in my arms i now am VERY careful with temps. Lucky for me all my babies are past the age of three. There is a fine line here though...I would never just let my kids have a fever without VERY closly monitering it...and yes I have all those homopathics in my medicine cabinant but sometimes they just plain don't work. Dye free motrin has it's place.

Kelley Though I doubt you'll be at all interested in what I have to say given our completely different views regarding medicine, here is my 2 cents:

"Fever is not some magical defense against infection. Fever is (usually) caused by the release of certain cytokines as a reaction to many different stimuli, especially infection. There is no evidence that suppression of fever prevents healing."

From Dr. Lipson on Science Based Medicine - here's a link to the whole article if you're interested. It supports everything I have learned in the last year regarding human physiology. ... Read More

Personally, I have tried homeopathic medicine in the past before I had done my research, it was completely useless, and now I know better. I would never recommend the use homeopathic remedies to anyone.

Roxanne There is always a place and time for medicine dont get me wrong but also to many people are to quick to use it when we dont know enough about it.

Josie-How scary for you that happened and I totally agree with you .

Kelley- just because homeopathy didnt work for u doesnt mean it doesnt work for others.If it never worked people wouldnt keep using it . Or is this like vaccine thing as well? everyone just jumped on the wagon ?I also strongly disagree that our instincts betray us like this article u mention says.I also think that it is a shame the author that you posted bashes the other one in such an immature way. On every topic of science there is doctors on both sides . ...

By the way I would really like you to start keeping your 2 cents to yourself on my facebook because it is getting neither of us anywhere .

Kelley consider yourself deleted. you will never have to see a post from me again.

Kelley which is a shame, because I do enjoy many of the links you share, but apparently these issues are too volatile.

Roxanne I am sorry that u feel like that's the answer kelley but it seems u only post on links when u want to disagree with them.

Tessa I second that

Now a little background the women who was argueing her point here has been on my facebook many times letting me know it is wrong we dont vaccinate. She has also posted posts about me being uneducated because we believe diffrently.

Your probley wondering like whats your point ? Well I wanted to point out that we each are entitled to our own opinons, we are all entitled to do with our family as we please and there isnt always a need to point out that you do things diffrently, there is always going to be diffrences between you and others and the best thing to do it to learn from each other so you are educated on both sides.

It Has Been...

Slow with a touch of a nasty cough, sore throat and lots of disney movies . Yes thats right we have been sick . Moms dont really get sick days so I ended up being the sickest but hey Nana ( my mom) came over to help and that is what she did . She cleaned, she cooked and she held an unhappy teething babe.

On a diffrent note we have been making lots of good gluten free treats like snickerdoodle cookies and chocolate chip cookies. Nothing beats cookies and milk on a sick day with a fire.

We had therapy last week at the park and well it went...ok . I mean Riaan was so excited to show R all the cool leafs, toys and rocks. But I am still trying to figure out how this helps him . I am still trying to figure out what guided play means .

This blog is just a little bit of everything ! Hopefully soon we will all feel better and I will be back in action with something better to talk about .

Thursday, October 1, 2009

Breakfast Bars

Laura's Favorite Anytime Cookie

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.

3/4 cup raw sugar*
3/4 cup brown sugar*
1 cup almond butter (if you have a nut allergy, you could probably replace with vegan margarine without ill effect)
1 teaspoon vanilla
approximately 2/3 cup applesauce
2 1/4 cups chickpea (or garbonzo, or gram- but not graham) flour**
2 teaspoon baking soda
1 cup vegan semi-sweet chocolate chips or dairy-free dark chocolate chunks***
1 cup dried cranberries
1 cup raisins
1 cup sunflower seeds

Mix dry and wet in seperate bowls, then mix together. A food processor or mixer is handy for this recipe.

*You can probably get away with just 1 cup total of sugar, especially if you include the chocolate. It's pretty sweet.

**Chickpea flour is bitter before cooking. This may bother some more than others. I don't notice a beany flavor after cooking, but the raw batter- YUCK! If the chickpea is a problem for you, brown rice flour works as well. But of course, it is higher carb/ lower protein, and has a different texture.

***I recently discovered why some vegans don't use white sugar. Apparently it is frequently whitened with bone-char. I had no idea.

Source of the original recipe, which has been adapted:

Pictures to come tomorrow

Developmental Preschool

I know that we are still 6 months away from this but wow am I scared. We follow a believe in parenting they call attachment parenting, meaning we have unseperating children . Only 2 people besides myself and my husband have ever watched my children . They have never slept away from us and we believe strongly in the importance of acknowledging there emotions and needs.

With that said leaving Riaan with a stranger for 2.5 hours 4 days a week is very scary for me . I know that these people are trained and work well with children like Riaan but the fear is still there . I am scared that if something happens they wont know how to calm him down , recognize his emotions the way he is use to, and get the nurturing he is use to .

I have a dear friend who has a son E who is 4 and is going to developmental preschool. He comes home everyday and screams! He screams to decompress the stress from the school, he is over stimulated and overwhelmed. She handles it with grace and I am not sure if I could .

We were planning on Homeschooling and still plan to but wonder if he goes to this preschool what that means for us . How will affect homeschooling ? Will I be trained to school him ? What if he enjoys it so much he wants to continue ?

I guess the bottom line is this wasnt in the cards for us so now the questions are coming and I feel like I dont know the answers.

Day 24 Gluten Free

This will be my last Gluten Free day marker . We know that this diet has changed so much for our lives. We see Riaan being more manageable, listening better, not having tantrums, responding to our respectful requests and those are just a few of the improvements.

At this time we are going to keep some dairy in his diet but have decided to start eliminating it . We are going to start slow and see how it works for our family . We currently eat alot of dairy and things such as cheese arent so easily replaced like for the wheat and gluten.

We are happy this his processing of words and communication has improved so much . We hope that things will continue to improve and allow for some much more learning . I have been blessed with new friends on this same diet and they have opened our eyes to see that this is yes a change but it is managable .